If you’re scrambling right now, trying to figure out what to do after your girlfriend dumped you, it may be some consolation to know that you’re not alone. Just about every guy at some point goes through this exact thing.

It can definitely be a crazy time. Your mind is racing, trying to think of ways to get her back. Hatching schemes and thinking way, way outside the box. In fact, so far outside the box that your solutions almost seem a little crazy to anyone looking from the outside in. However, in your state of mind, they seem quite reasonable.

One such scheme maybe the notion to make your ex jealous. In fact, that’s one of the first things that people think about immediately after getting dumped. It just seems to be the default solution to your problems.

Now I’m not saying that making her jealous is not going to work, but there is a right way and a wrong way of doing this. At the very least, you have a very good chance of regaining some of that psychological power back. And that’s always a good thing.

Using jealousy does not come without risk. If you decide to go down this road, there’s the very real possibility that you can be found out. When I say found out, I’m talking about the very real possibility that she may find out that this is all for her benefit. If she finds out that you’re simply trying to make her jealous and that is your primary goal, you’re pretty much finished.

Once you embark on the jealousy solution, there’s no turning back.

One other important thing that you have to remember is the fact that there’s going to be another person involved. How are you going to handle this? Have you considered her feelings? Are you not simply going to be using her to get your ex back? Are you really prepared to use someone like this?

Now having said all that, it may turn out that you really don’t have to date anyone at all. In fact, it may be better that you leave this up to her imagination. If you paraded a new person in front of her, it’s going to look too obvious.

It’s really going to call for a much more subtle approach. Don’t be too obvious. Don’t make it look like you want her to see you with someone else.

A much more effective way of doing this is to very discreetly become friends with someone of the opposite sex. Don’t make it look like you’re boyfriend girlfriend. Simply hang out with this person from a strictly social aspect. It’s a lot better if there are more people around too. The best approach here is to let her think whatever she wants in her own mind. The more it seems forced, the more obvious it’s going to look.

So the first thing you would want to do right now is to expand your social contacts, expand your circle of friends, get into the habit of socializing more, and don’t be afraid to make some more female friends.

The key to using jealousy as a tactic to get your ex back is to make it look like you’re not trying.

Your ex-girlfriend dumped you and you’re devastated. Okay that goes without saying. But what you didn’t expect was the way she’s treating you right now, at this very moment. I mean, you’ve really done nothing wrong, yet she’s treating you like some sort of subhuman. Strangers get a warmer response then you. If you’re looking for any sort of compassion or you’re trying to make sense of things, something like this can drive you crazy.

Don’t get too down on yourself. Because what you’re witnessing now is really a self protection mechanism that she’s using to soften the blow. No one is going to turn off their feelings just like that. The last thing you want to be doing right now is taking things personally. I know you’ve done nothing to deserve this attitude, but if you stop for a second and think about the reasoning behind it, you may realize that things aren’t always what they seem.

However, right here, right now, this is something you have to deal with. Though you may know the reasoning behind her behavior, it doesn’t make it any better for your state of mind. If you’re trying to get through her rough exterior at the moment, give yourself a break and back off a little. This isn’t making it easier for anyone. You have to have faith that things are going to get better. You have to have faith that this is not the real her coming through. You have to know that it’s all down to high emotions.

Needless to say, this is going to require some patience. You aren’t going to fix things quickly and you’re going to have to start playing the long game. Patience and perseverance is the order of the day.

If you’re able to convince yourself you can live without her, you may notice the black cloud lifting. That’s not to say that you want to live without her, but psychologically you have to tell yourself that you are able to get along in life on your own.

Make sure you give her some time to cool off. During this time you shouldn’t be trying to get her back and you should be treating her with the utmost respect. Over the course of a week or so, you could see a huge difference. During this time let her know that you’re there as a friend if she needs you.

This isn’t what she’s going to expect. She’ll still be expecting you to be needy and desperate, meanwhile you’re supportive and understanding. What a difference! No doubt she’s going to be taken by surprise.

After a week or so, it’s time to ramp things up a little. I’m not saying that you should profess your undying love, but you can start getting a little more friendly. These are very uncertain times and you are really going to have to take your time and think about what you say and do. Think friend mode. I know down the road you don’t really want to be friends, but this is something that’s going to have to happen first. You simply can’t jump right back into a romantic relationship with her – it simply doesn’t work that way.

Best of luck!

There is no guarantee that you are going to get your ex back. As shocking as this sounds, it’s the truth and most likely the last thing you want to hear right now. As a mature adult, you have to realize that not all situations are salvageable and not all relationships are meant to continue past the breakup. You are in a very unique situation right now where the thought of never getting your loved one back seems impossible – and that is the hard part. Some day, you may realize that the breakup was the best thing that could have happened – but for now, you are having a hard time getting your head around such a notion.

While you may be consumed with getting your ex back, maybe you should be concerned with how you are going to get over the breakup and move on with your life. If your relationship is not salvageable, you are putting yourself in an impossible situation by only allowing yourself one outcome: and that outcome is to get him/her back.

Okay, so how do you know that it really is over for good? Well, the only person that can answer that is you. Deep down, you know the answer to this and you know that you may have to cut ties sooner, rather than later. But you may only realize it after you get past the raw emotion you are feeling at the moment. Time to develop some coping skills.

No Contact

We all know that the worst thing that you can do after being dumped is to continue contacting your ex. That is just going to make you look desperate and undesirable. Now, even if you cannot imagine that you are never going to have your loved one back, you are going to have to act as though it is over – at least for a while. If you were meant to be together, you will have given things time to cool down a bit. If it really is over, you have started on the path to recovery.

During this time, the best thing you can do is act as thought you are single again. That does not mean that you have to start dating people just to show your ex how desirable you really are and what they are missing. No, but on the other hand, it does not mean that you cannot have an active social life. This is going to remind you of what you are missing out there and also show your ex that you are stronger than what they gave you credit for.

2-4 Weeks Later

Within weeks, you should know if the relationship is dead or if there really is a chance that you’ll get back together. The anxiety should have subsided a bit and without all those emotions guiding you, you are going to be be thinking more clearly. If you know that he/she is the love of your life and you are meant to be together, then start working on getting them back. If you know is is over, then accept that and move on.

For many people, the real problem is when they cannot see reality and they continue to delude themselves – in which case, there is no advice in the world that is going to repair the relationship. Bear in mind that there is no magic button. There is no course that you can take that is going to make things great again. Not unless you actually do have a chance and you are willing to work at making it happen.

One Positive Thing

One silver lining in an otherwise dark cloud is that if you cannot revive the relationship, there is a reason for it. Maybe you don’t remember how bad thing really were? Perhaps you are overlooking all the negatives and concentrating on the positives (rose-colored glasses syndrome). If you believe in the notion that things happen for a reason, perhaps one day you are going to look back on this and realize what a narrow escape you really had.

Getting Help

If you are about to invest in one of the popular get-your-ex-back courses, I would caution you to really think about what you want. Just because it feels as though you can’t live without your ex does not mean that you are going to be able to get them back with 100% certainty (or that you should be with them in the first place). Take some time to grieve and then really think about your options once the emotions have subsided.

While it may be tempting to try and make your ex jealous or play other similar mind games after a breakup, you should know that it is not likely to end well and is going to make things a whole lot worse. I know it can be tempting to want to punish your ex and make them feel bad, but what you may not realize is that it is going to be obvious to them what you are doing and any credibility you have is going to be put in jeopardy.

You don’t suddenly start acting a certain way for no reason, and anything outside of your normal behavior is going to seem suspicious.

Here are a few things that simply won’t work, yet people continue to do them:

Jealousy - Yep, making your ex jealous is one of the oldest tricks in the book, yet it is something that most of us are guilty of. The thought of having someone else to show off is incredibly tempting, but what you don’t see is how obvious it makes you look. No one is going to buy this and the only thing you are going to succeed in doing is making yourself look insecure. No one wants to be with someone like that.

You also have to think about the person you are using to make your ex jealous. Yep, that’s right, you are using them because you probably have no intention of starting a relationship with this person. You don’t know what they are thinking of while all this is going on. If you are pretending to have a serious relationship, there is a very good chance that they are going to be thinking the same thing. Something to keep in mind if you are guilty of doing this.

Faking Anger – Yeah, they hurt you, now you are going to let them have it by ignoring them and/or telling them exactly what you think of them. That’ll show em. Uh, no, not really. In fact, acting like that is juvenile and makes you look shallow. Not only that, but it has been proven that this kind of anti-social behavior only ends up hurting you. No one cares if you are throwing a hissy fit and ignoring everyone around you, least of all your ex. The longer you do this, the worse you are making things.

Pretending That Everything is Fine – You have been dumped. That is something that is going to cause emotional distress. So why are you going around as though nothing has happened? Why are you getting on with your life, laughing and carrying on as though you haven’t a care in the world? It is normal to be subdued and maybe a little depressed after you have been dumped – don’t be afraid to show your real mood. If you are going around as though everything is okay, people are going to assume that you are going through some kind of breakdown or you are faking it. Unfortunately, most are going to know that it is all an act – including your ex.

Playing mind games is any kind of behavior that is meant to influence your ex in some way. Whether it be feeling sorry for you or feeling sad that they made the mistake of dumping you, you are trying to instill feelings of guilt and remorse. You want them to feel bad. The problem is, your tactics suck and everyone but you can see through them. Eventually, you are going to have to come clean and it is going to be more difficult than if you did nothing at all.

Don’t underestimate your ex and don’t insult their intelligence. Mind games always end in disaster, whether it be in a current relationship or one that has already ended.

Get Him Back

Get Her Back

Or learn the magic text messages that will have them crawling back in no time!

 

 

We all know that one of the worst things you can do after you get dumped is to keep in touch with your ex. If you don’t know this, it could be the source of all your pain at the moment. But don’t feel too bad, it is one of the most common mistakes that individuals make after breaking up. Just remember that if you continue to stay in contact, you are making things much worse – that has been proven time and time again.

Okay, so you know that you have to break off contact, but how long should you stay away – and what really constitutes “no contact?”

First, let’s talk about why you need to stay away.

You need to limit your exposure to this incredibly traumatic experience for your own piece of mind and mental health. As long as you keep going back, the nightmare is never going to end and the emotions are not going to subside (in fact, they are likely to get worse).

You are going to be continuously second guessing things, beating yourself up, working yourself into an emotional frenzy every moment of the day because you are still involved with your ex and the situation. If you are texting him/her, you are going to feel even worse when you get no response. If you see your ex getting on with their life, you are going to feel as though you have been deserted by the one person in the world you felt a special bond with. Are you going to hang around, wondering where they are and what they are doing every minute of the day? Why would you put yourself through that kind of pain? Well, for the simple fact that you can’t let go. In your mind, if you break off contact, you’ve lost them for good.

But nothing could be further from the truth.

You want a complete break because you need it emotionally and you have to show him/her that you are not going to beg and plead for them to take you back. You are going to show strength and courage by not giving in to the usual desperate behavior most of us are guilty of after a breakup. If you can do this convincingly, human nature will make sure that your ex is going to see you in a different light. We all want what we can’t have and if you are not there for him/her, they are going to start missing you like crazy. Well, in most cases anyway. In short, you are going to get a little of that psychological power back.

But is staying away really enough to reignite those feeling? Is it enough to make them start feeling attraction towards you again? Is it enough for them to really want you back? Yes, it can be, but there is no guarantee. The thing is, you have no choice. If you don’t take a break, there is very little chance that you are going to be able to salvage anything at all. In fact, you are likely to make things a lot worse.

So, basically, you have no choice in the matter.

How long should you stay away?

Okay, so the big question is how long should you stay away? While there is no shortage of advice when it comes to breaking off contact with an ex, you should take things with a grain of salt and question everything. You’ll notice that the time period varies greatly depending on who you are listening to. However, it is really down to your ex and their personality type. And don’t forget that it is not only about them. You have to think of how long you need to get over the emotions so that you can function again.

Generally speaking, you should give yourself a few weeks off. That is a good starting point and then you can see  how things go after that. Are you still emotional? Is your ex warming up to you or do you still sense a coldness? You are going to have to rely on your gut instinct here.

While you are away, make sure that it is a real “no contact” period. This is where most people make their mistake. If you want it to work, you have to really break off contact. Do not text or phone them, make sure that you are not in a situation where you are going to run into them. Make sure that you limit the temptation as much as possible by finding other things to occupy your time.

If you are having a hard time staying away, you could always make choices that will help you (force you) to keep away. Take a vacation for a few weeks if that is something that you can do. Get rid of your cell phone for a few weeks so that you aren’t always tempted to call or text. Having the ability to contact your ex in the palm of your hand can be way too tempting. Adjust your schedule so that there is no way of running into him/her. It takes a bit of planning, but if you are serious about making it for at least a few weeks, you’ll find a way.

In the event that you do see your ex during this time period, make sure that you stay neutral. You don’t want to look at though you are trying to avoid them. Make sure you look happy and resist the urge to mope around. You have to look as though you are over it and you have moved on.

When you feel that enough time has gone by, don’t suddenly start texting them and phoning them – that is going to look odd and they are going to suspect it was all an act. Instead, just relax and get back into your routine. Go about your daily business – don’t worry about bumping into your ex – it is going to eventually happen. The key to making this work is patience – it has to look natural.

Of course, things could go a lot faster if your ex starts making an effort to contact you. In fact, don’t be surprised if they suddenly start wondering where you are and sending messages after a few days. It is simple human nature to want what we can’t have and if you are not available, there is a very good chance that they are going to start missing you.

On the other hand, you may have to wait a while before you are able to re-establish contact. You will know when you are ready, but sometimes it is going to take more than mere weeks. Sometimes you are going to have to wait months before it feels right to contact him/her. Bear in mind that you don’t want to wait too long or you are going to lose your ex for good. The strong feelings they may have had for you could diminish given enough time. In other words, you are going to have to strike a balance between not giving in too soon and waiting too long. Your mileage may vary.

Listen to this message about getting your ex back:

Get Him Back

Get Her Back

 

 

 

 

Things are bad.

Your ex left and you are devastated. So much so that you can barely muster up the courage to get on with the necessary things in life, like your job, paying bills, and interacting with people. While I certainly sympathize with you (I have been there myself), the truth is that you are going to have to toughen up, get a grip and realize that this kind of self-indulgent, feeling sorry for yourself behavior is not going to do anything for you. In fact, it is going to do the opposite of what you need right now.

By all rights, the world should cut you some slack given the seriousness of the situation, right? Do people not realize how much you are hurting? I know how unjust it feels when the world just carries on without you, leaving you to fend for yourself, but the truth is that no one really cares with the exception of those closest to you.

Picture looking at your situation as a casual observer. Are you going to feel compassion for everyone you know who is going through a breakup? No, in fact, you may be more apt to want to give them a kick in the behind and get them to snap out of their stupor. Well, that is, unless they were a close friend or family member and you honestly worried about their emotional well being. But the average person? Nope, not going to care one way or another. And the sooner you get out of this entitlement attitude, the better off you are going to be.

When it comes to your ex, you are not going to get much sympathy. Well, you might, but it is going to be because they feel so guilty for dumping you. But the longer you mope around and seek out sympathy from anyone who’ll listen, the longer you are going to drag this out.

Pick yourself up right now and fight the urge to feel sorry for yourself. Acknowledge the fact that you have had a traumatic experience, but work towards shaking off this feeling of depression. Get out with other people and mingle a little. Do not go on about your problems, instead, just socialize as if your ex did not exist. And try your best to suppress the negative thoughts and feelings you have at the
moment. No one wants to be around someone like that and they do not want to hear about how miserable your life has become. You don’t have to paste on a fake happy face, but you should try your best to look approachable.

But what if you are not able to do this? It is one thing to tell someone to shake it off and get back out there, but something else entirely to actually have to do it yourself. No one knows the depths of your suffering unless they have actually been there.

While it’s true that everyone is different and something like this can really devastate an individual, there are things you can do right now to get back on the right path. For example, you could start taking small steps towards your goal. Instead of forcing yourself to get out there, acting as though nothing is bothering you, maybe you could start by getting out of the house and going for a walk. You don’t have to socialize with anyone, just get used to getting out again. In time, you may feel like getting together with family members and/or friends.

So, get out there now. Drop what you are doing and simply go for a walk. I bet you are going to feel better for doing so.

Can you really get your ex back by sending them a text message?

Does it seem as though everyone is having the time of their lives – except you? Do you envy people for having a seemingly bountiful life and for being genuinely happy? Well, though you may not think so, this attitude of yours has probably cost you a lot – including your previous relationship.

If you are reeling from the shock of losing your love and all you can think about is how to get them back, you may want to stop for a second and think about how you are handling everything else in your life. What you may find is that losing your ex is just something that happened as a result of your outlook on life and the way you react to things. In other words, you may be trying to fix the symptom, when you should be trying to fix the cause.

Sound like a lot of psychological babble? Perhaps, but it wouldn’t hurt to take a look at other areas in your life and try to recognize some similarities. It stands to reason that if you are struggling here, you would also be struggling in the romance department.

One thing you may want to consider is how you get along with people in general. Do you have a lot of friends? Are you easy to get along with and generally likeable? This can tell you a lot about who you are.

If you do not have a lot of friends, and people are a little standoffish with you, there is a reason for it. It is not likely that there is something inherently wrong with you that you have no chance of fixing, it is more likely that you have an opportunity to change your life for the better by tweaking a few areas of your personality.

It all comes down to personality. I know that there are things about you that you cannot change, but there are also some things that you can change that are going to give you a great new perspective on life. You would be surprised at how quickly you can turn things around.

If you are withdrawn and have very few friends, there is a good chance that you are not able to truly connect with others – and there is a very good chance that you were not able to connect with your ex on an intimate level. In addition, you may have been very insecure in the relationship – unsure of yourself and always fearful that it would come to a crashing halt. This self-fulfilling prophecy could have been hanging over both of you for a long time.

For someone who has little in their life, a relationship could mean everything. It may even start defining who they are as a person as they become more and more attached. The idea of losing it may seem too much to bear. In fact, it could feel as though no one is ever going to fall for you again and that you “lucked out” securing this one relationship. Could this be why you were possessive and did not trust your partner?

There is no guarantee that you are going to get your ex back. The good news is that time is going to fix everything for you and you are going to start feeling better in the coming days and weeks. However, if you don’t fix your personality, you are likely to keep making the same mistakes.

Wondering where to start? Well, make it a point to start connecting with people again. The more contacts and friends you have, the less you are going to feel as though your relationship is a one-off. You are going to feel confident that you can go out there and find someone else if things don’t work out. Just knowing this is going to make you seem a lot less needy, and that, ironically, is going to make you look more desirable and confident in your partner’s eyes.

Text Your Ex Back Into Your Life – Does it really work?

Okay, so what do I mean by renting space in your ex’s head? Well, simply put, you want to have them thinking about you after the breakup. In fact, you want them to obsess about you even if they don’t want to acknowledge that they are obsessing about you. In order to do this, you are going to have to be very cool and calm about things in the aftermath of the breakup. Needless to say, confidence is going to play a huge role.

If you are able to make your ex think about you without making it look like you are trying, you are going to be off to a good start. If they think, even for a second, that you are intentionally doing things to manipulate the situation, then you are going to fail.

One thing you do not want to do is underestimate your former partner’s ability to see through you. This is possibly one of the biggest mistakes people make after a breakup. The bottom line is that you have to almost believe it yourself if you want to convince them that it is the real deal.

One example of this is when you simply start doing your own thing and you act as though you are perfectly fine. This is an incredibly powerful tactic for many reasons, but it is only effective if you are able to convince your ex that you are really acting genuine. If they suspect that it is all act for their benefit, you are not going to go far – in fact, you are going to damage your credibility with them permanently.

Now, one problem people have with acting like they don’t care is that they don’t want their ex to think that they don’t care. Can you see where the problem lies? You are so worried about offending your ex and “losing them” for good, you fail to do the one thing that is going to create the interest and attraction that you need to get your relationship back. That one thing is to take away their power over you by simply getting on with your life and making it look as genuine as possible.

Oftentimes, it is not what you say that makes a bigger impact, it is what you don’t say. If you concentrate on your own life, you are going to steal back some of that power you gave up right after the split. If you make it look like it is no big deal, you are going to get their attention – that is simple human nature. They are going to be wondering why you are not phoning and texting. They are going to wonder why you aren’t begging them to come back. They are going to wonder what they are doing wrong. And that, my friend, is going to put you in the driver’s seat. They are going to be obsessed with you – not the other way around. In short, you are going to be renting space in their head.

Looking for a time-tested method to get your ex back? Click Here!

 

 

In almost every case, friends and family like to help anyone who has just gone through a breakup. That is all well and good, but you have to take some of that help with a grain of salt and you have to prevent them from getting too involved with your personal life. Thought they may feel that they are doing you a favor, they can be the source of unneeded grief.

It is natural that the people who are closest to you are going to want to help, but sometimes you don’t need to have your ex on the receiving end of their wrath. In a situation like this, you are best to simply tell your friends and family to steer clear of your ex. If you really want to get him/her back, the last thing you want to do is create any hard feelings between those closest to you and your former partner.

If you ever manage to get them back, you want to make sure that there is no long term damage done because they are going to be a part of your family again at some point. Imagine how difficult it is going to be if someone said something that was particularly nasty, thinking that they were just sticking up for you and that they would never see this person again? It could be a little embarrassing, to say the least.

The other thing you have to think about is how this is going to harm your relationship with your friends and family if they start putting your ex down, only to have to backtrack when the relationship is restored. Could you forgive someone who said some nasty things about your mate during the split? While you know that they are only saying these things to show solidarity with you during your time of need, the things they say could stay at the back of your mind for a long time.

The bottom line is that you are going to want to maintain some neutrality after the breakup. Avoid venting on people and bad mouthing your ex because this is going to lead to them acting in the same way as a form of support. You may find that they are going to tell you what they really think of your ex, and it may not be nice. Sometimes they just say things to make you feel better without thinking that it could come back to haunt them.

It is one thing to confide in a trusted friend, but something else to broadcast your predicament to your entire group of friends. Who needs more complication in their life?

And speaking of complicating things…. Did you know that most of us do not have a clue when it comes to getting an ex back? In fact, the majority start out on the wrong foot and it gets worse from there. What if you have a guide that showed you how to start and every move you should to be making in order to get your ex back? Click Here  for the ultimate get your ex back guide.

No matter how hard you try, nothing you say or do is making a difference when it comes to getting your ex back. In fact, you may have noticed that your actions are actually having the opposite effect – they are driving your ex further away.

If this sounds like you, your problem may be psychological. In other words, certain things may be going on that are causing you to act desperate and needy. In turn, this is turning your ex off. In some cases, you can literally “think” your way into such a situation.

Here is how it usually works:

Your ex tells you it is over. From that moment on, you are on the losing end of a psychological battle of wits that you have no hope of winning. By breaking up with you, your ex is showing you that they no longer want to be with you. That is going to give them the upper hand from that moment on.

You, on the other hand, are at a disadvantage. You have no hand, so to speak. You have no power over your ex because you are the one who was rejected. This is one thing you have to come to terms with and accept that you can’t change it.

However, you can change the way you handle yourself. You don’t have to fall into the trap that most other dumpees do. You don’t  have to blow things out of proportion and make mistakes that will permanently damage your chances of getting your ex back. The way you start, is by changing the way you think.

It is natural to want to “fix” the situation when you are told it is over. You aren’t thinking about how to handle yourself psychologically. You aren’t thinking about being discreet and controlling your emotions. You are not thinking about how your actions are going to affect your long-term chances of getting your ex back. No, you are thinking about how you can make things right. You are thinking about getting back to the way things were. You are thinking about stopping the pain.

The problem with this is that you are going to start acting desperate – despite your best efforts. You are going to start contacting your ex to find out why they dumped you and what you can do to make it better. What you don’t understand is that you are making yourself look needy with every text message and phone call you make. You are telling them that it is okay that they dumped you and you want to make up. When it doesn’t work (and it won’t), and  you get rejected, you are going to feel humiliated and even more distraught – this is going to lead to even more desperation and the cycle goes on and on. Eventually, you may get to the point where your ex just doesn’t want anything to do with you. Not a good position to be in.

Can you relate to all this? Have you been there and done that?

If you are in a similar situation, there is hope – but you are going to have to act fast. One thing you can do right now is get yourself out of the negative situation that is causing all your grief. The longer you are around familiar things that remind you of your ex, the worse off you are going to be. This is all affecting you psychologically, though you may not realize it. It is your current environment that is making you act a little crazy.

Try this: Simply make it a point to leave for a few days or a week. Get away completely and make sure that it is not possible to contact your ex. Initially, it is going to feel foreign and uncomfortable, but eventfully you are going to start forgetting about your troubles and enjoying yourself. Give it a try. If you can’t bear to be away from your ex, try getting some help from a friend. There is nothing wrong with asking for help at a time like this.

Give it a week and I guarantee you are going to start feeling a lot better.

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