Breakups are a fact of life. And no, I’m not trying to trivialize your predicament – in fact, you should take comfort in the fact that it is a normal problem that 99% of the population will experience at some point. It’s not you, there’s nothing inherently wrong with you, it’s just that you’re going through the same tough time that most of us do at some point. How you deal with it is going to determine whether you get your ex back and carry on with your relationship or not. Just remember this: you’re at a point where you can change your destiny. You don’t have to make the same mistakes others do. You can come out of this in good shape if you take the right steps.
In order to break away from the norm, you’re going to have to start thinking more logically. In order to do this, you need to push your emotions aside and do what is practical, not what you feel. It’s a time for tough decisions and maybe a little tough love.
How do you feel at the moment? I’ll bet you have an overwhelming urge to contact your ex. This is an example of how you can be led astray by your emotions. What do you have to gain by contacting him/her at the moment? Do you honestly think that anything you say will make a difference?
The truth is that any contact now is most certainly destined to fail and will make things a whole lot tougher for you in the future. You don’t want to come off as desperate and needy – and you most certainly will if you follow your emotions.
After you’ve had a few days to grieve and mourn your loss, it’s time to get someone else involved. Left on your own, and if you’re highly emotional, it’s only a matter of time before you break down and contact your ex. One of the best ways to prevent this is to enlist the help of a friend or family member to get you through the next few weeks. Simply having someone there for advice, or to use as a sounding board, is going to be extremely beneficial.
Remember, all you have to do is get through the next few weeks and things will seem a whole lot brighter. Once you can approach your ex with confidence, not neediness, the conversation is going to go a whole lot better. In fact, it’s entirely likely that you may see them start to warm up to you.